As a person who once firmly believed in the strength of NO and suffered from its consequences, I would today solemnly advise everyone against making the same mistake.
I see now, that saying Yes all the time has its advantages, since we all live in the eyes of others.
1. Everyone loves a person who says Yes to everything. Even a grumpy Yes scores way above an apologetic No.
2. You feel you can rely on the person who always says Yes.
3. If you say No only once a year, it is okay. Others will forgive you for that oversight.
4. So what if the person who says Yes spends sleepless nights completing everything she has committed to? Everyone else says, “Wow, she never sleeps! She’s always available to help us.”
5. If you say Yes to everything, no one can refuse you when its your turn to request help.
6. People unconnected to your workplace may say ‘Just say No if you can’t do it, because you need to balance your professional and personal life, blah blah’ – but remember, they aren’t paying you salary.
7. When you say Yes once, people expect you to say Yes again, and you hate to disappoint them since they depend on you so much.
8. In the same vein, when you say No once, people expect you to say No always and never approach you with anything. You lose out on opportunities.
9. You don’t suppose the Boss is going to say, “Give her a very high rating, because she takes up only what she can do, says No to the rest and leaves because her family is her priority – and rightfully so.” Do you?
10. The right time to start saying No is when you’re the Boss. The Art of saying No and plopping everything on subordinates is often known as ‘Delegating.’
I am sure there are arguments in favour of No. In fact, I know of those better than anyone – because I was once an advocate for the cause. But when the moment of truth arrived, my NOs rallied against me and the rest is… too painful to remember.
What matters is, at the end of the day when you crawl to bed, do you regret the Yes or the No that ruled your day?
Did the Yes-es break your back? But are you delighted about the broken back?
Did the Nos give you peace of mind? Are you happy with what you got?